


Puzzle

by blastintoorbit



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hyerim, Nobody Dies, Some swear words, Written on Impulse, because we need more hyerim, hyunjin as yerim's big sis, side chuuves, some violence, sooyoung as hyejoo's big sis and she got hurt trying to protect her
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-11
Updated: 2019-10-11
Packaged: 2020-12-09 04:55:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20989187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blastintoorbit/pseuds/blastintoorbit
Summary: A confused Yerim with a troubled Hyejoo.





	Puzzle

**Author's Note:**

> Tw// violence, blood  
A little messy, but enjoy :)

Hyejoo.

The name that pops out in Yerim’s mind at the most random time of the day. The name that keeps her up at night. It’s been almost five months since they had a proper conversation about their relationship. 

What are they now? 

Friends? 

Strangers? 

Lovers?

Is Yerim never good enough for Hyejoo? Is she being too clingy? Is she being too sensitive? Is loving Hyejoo too much a bad thing?

Is it time to finally let go?

Over the past few months, Yerim had been very confused. One moment, Yerim will feel like that she has a chance, but then the next she would feel hopeless about the entire situation. 

Yerim tried to figure the way out. She really did. 

But it feels like all of Yerim’s efforts had been futile.

The both of them went out for a movie. The movie was funny and all, and Yerim was enjoying it a lot. That is, until she realised that Hyejoo’s fingers were intertwined with hers. At that moment, her heart started to hammer against her chest, and butterflies appeared in her stomach. However, she didn’t try to let go.

Hyejoo then let out a laughter, along with the rest of the audience, probably because the main character in the movie did something stupid again. Yerim let Hyejoo’s voice sink into her, and she just stared at her like she’s the only thing that she has ever seen. 

Hyejoo then turned to look at her, still smirking from the previous part of the show. Yerim turned her head to the left, feeling a little embarrassed that she was caught staring. Hyejoo didn’t seem to mind.

For the rest of the movie, Yerim tried her best to just focus on the screen. It was hard to do so, because every now and then Hyejoo would lean her head against Yerim’s right shoulder, which causes Yerim to tense up upon the contact. Or when they reach out for that bucket of popcorn at the same time, when their free hands touch. 

Towards the end, the movie got a little too boring for Yerim’s liking, so she slowly started to drift off. Her eyelids were heavy and her neck was having trouble keeping her head up. Hyejoo noticed it and took her head off Yerim’s shoulder. 

Yerim was just about to fall into unconsciousness when she felt something. It was there and then gone in a split second, but she felt it. On her right cheek. 

Her cheeks started to boil as she rotate her head to face Hyejoo. She was yawning, with her palm covering her mouth. Yerim would pounce on Hyejoo right there and then and tell her how adorable her sleepy expression was, but Yerim remembered that they were in a public place.

And they weren’t what they used to be anymore.

So what was that little peck on the cheek for?

Was Yerim just imagining things?

The following weekend, Yerim went to Hyejoo’s house. She didn’t want to be there. But there she was, sitting on the marble floor waiting for Hyejoo to finish setting up the console.

But maybe she did want to be there. Her brain said no, but her heart made her try. 

She glanced around the house. It’s been a while since she was there, and everything looks pretty much the same, with nothing out of place. 

Hyejoo threw the game controller onto Yerim’s lap, startling her. And with that, they started playing what they always play together, Super Smash Bros. 

They played for hours, without a care about the time. Yerim was whining at how Hyejoo had won five times in a row, and pleaded Hyejoo to let her win just one more round, but Hyejoo stuck out her tongue at her playfully.

They went for another round again, and this time, Yerim managed to end Hyejoo’s winning streak.

She didn’t know Hyejoo let her win.

Yerim dropped her controller and shot up from the floor, squealing in delight over her victory. She then attacked Hyejoo with a tight embrace, which was unexpected for Hyejoo, so she fell onto the floor on her back, with Yerim on top of her. 

Yerim hastily pulled away after she realized what she’d done. Her skin started to burn and she quickly apologized to Hyejoo. Hyejoo laughed as she got back up. 

“Typical Yerim.” She says.

Afterwards, they decided to watch some Netflix. Yerim didn’t understand the people in the show Bird Box. Why kill yourself because you saw a monster? Was it really ugly or something? Will I die if I saw the monster?? The monster was never actually shown, but Yerim still felt terrified while watching it. So much so that she didn’t realize that she was clinging on to Hyejoo’s arm for dear life.

But as time progressed, Yerim got tired and her eyes could shut on her at anytime. Hyejoo noticed that she wasn’t fidgeting as much anymore. 

Soon, Yerim closed her eyes completely and slept. The last thing she remembered was how comfortably warm it was, with a familiar jasmine scent lingering in her nose.

An hour passed. Yerim woke up from her slumber. She regained her senses, and noticed how a blanket was wrapped around her body neatly. It smelt nice. It smelt like Hyejoo. She then remembered that she was in Hyejoo’s house. 

Then, Yerim felt a vibration. Her eyes trailed down to the sofa, the seat next to hers. It was Hyejoo’s phone, screen faced downwards, the back upwards. 

Yerim knows she shouldn’t, but she was impulsive by nature. She flipped the phone without thinking twice. The screen lit up with a new notification. 

It was from someone saved as “Chaewon” in Hyejoo’s contacts. 

The notification reads,

Love u too hehe <3

Yerim stood up and made a beeline towards the exit. She didn’t feel like staying any longer. She didn’t tell Hyejoo she was leaving. 

Yerim knows she shouldn’t be jealous. Hyejoo and her relationship with this “Chaewon” could be purely platonic, and nothing more. And Hyejoo wouldn’t have moved on so quickly, right? 

But, Yerim thought about how she used to be the only person Hyejoo would sent “I love you” messages to. 

At school, Yerim didn’t know how to approach Hyejoo. Normally Hyejoo would be with her other friends, making it even harder. Yeojin, their younger friend, always shakes her head whenever she sees Yerim watching Hyejoo while hiding everyday. 

Then one day, Yeojin had enough of Yerim’s hide-and-no-seek game. She dragged a very reluctant Yerim along with her and interrupted Hyejoo and her friend. Since Yeojin’s voice can blow a hole in a wall, it’s almost impossible to ignore her. 

Yeojin called out for Hyejoo, and as Hyejoo turned around, Yerim spotted something. Hyejoo was holding her friend’s hand, with both of her palms. Hyejoo held it delicately, as if it’ll break like fragile glass if not careful. 

Yerim wished that it was her hand Hyejoo was holding instead. 

Hyejoo let go of her hands and shoved something deep into her pocket. She then bid goodbye to the blonde, addressing her as ‘Chaewon’. The name sounded familiar to Yerim. 

Oh. 

Right. 

The three of them walked home together. However, Yeojin lied that she had forgotten that she was supposed to meet her big sister, Haseul, at her workplace, so she left both Hyejoo and Yerim alone. Yerim, of course, could tell that she was lying. The wink she sent to her just confirms it. 

Hyejoo and Yerim walked in awkward silence. 

Yerim is usually an extroverted and lively and bubbly person, but she couldn’t bring herself to start a simple conversation with Hyejoo at that moment. Yerim didn’t know why. 

Yerim would steal some glances at Hyejoo, admiring how gorgeous Hyejoo’s side profile is. She didn’t know that Hyejoo noticed it. 

Hyejoo then abruptly stopped in her tracks. Yerim wondered why. She turned her head to the front. 

She froze, and stood rooted to the ground.

A big, ugly and mean dog was growling at them. It was tied to a leash. Its owner was nowhere to be found, however. It had a huge scar that ran across its left eye. And boy, did it looked mad.

The dog sprinted towards Hyejoo and Yerim. More specifically charging towards Yerim. Yerim screamed. Her legs didn’t want to budge, of all times. She shut her eyes tightly and defended her face with her arms, expecting the creature to pounce on her and scratch her and bite her. 

Yerim opened her eyes, perspiring cold sweat. She felt nothing, no pain. She was still in one piece, the dog hadn’t ripped her apart.

But there was blood. Blood that stained the concrete pathway. 

The blood belonged to Hyejoo. 

Yerim gasped at how badly the blood from Hyejoo’s right arm was oozing out, and she was at a loss of what to do. Hyejoo’s face with as red as her blood. The pain was excruciating.

Without any more delay, Hyejoo punched the dog in its eye with her left fist. The dog whimpered and let her arm go, scurrying off with its tail between its legs.

Yerim was still traumatized, but she was more worried about Hyejoo. She walked Hyejoo back home, thankful that it was just a few more houses away. 

Yerim helped washed the wound first. Hyejoo hissed in pain and Yerim muttered countless apologies. She let Hyejoo sit down on the sofa and hurried to find the first aid kit. She knew where it was placed because she’s been there too many times to not know. 

Yerim took out the antibiotic ointment and applied it on to Hyejoo’s wounds warily. Hyejoo tried her best to not flinch. Yerim took out the bandage and wrapped it around Hyejoo’s arm. None of them said anything to each other, until Hyejoo’s voice broke the silence.

“You still... wear that?” 

Yerim paused. She noticed that her necklace was dangling out. She immediately tuck it back inside her shirt. 

“It’s a nice necklace.” Yerim replied.

It was more than just nice. It was important to Yerim. Hyejoo got a pair of matching necklaces last year, on Valentines Day. The pendants were shaped to fit into each other, to complete the heart shape. Yerim’s pendant was engraved with Hyejoo’s name and vice versa. 

Yerim remembered vividly about how Hyejoo confessed to her. 

Yerim knew she had a crush on Hyejoo for the longest time, but she never knew that the feelings were mutual. Not until the day Hyejoo made her close her eyes as she sneakily secured the necklace in place. 

“Choi Yerim, will... you g-go out with me...?”

And you know what happened afterwards.

Good times.

Yerim was done wrapping Hyejoo’s arm. Hyejoo thanked her.

Yerim apologized to Hyejoo. Hyejoo didn’t accept it because it wasn’t her fault at all. She said that the dog just happened to be there, and either her or Yerim would definitely get hurt. Hyejoo chose to get hurt, so she threw herself in between Yerim and the dog.

Yerim still felt horrible. Hyejoo shook her head. Yerim stood up and sat next to Hyejoo. She opened her arms and pouted, silently demanding a hug from Hyejoo.

Hyejoo just smiled and nodded her head. Yerim felt a little better as she crawled towards Hyejoo and gave her a tight squeeze. Hyejoo’s scent never fails to make Yerim feel safe, happy, and loved. 

Or maybe scratch that last word out.

Yerim felt Hyejoo starting to loosen the hug. God, Yerim missed Hyejoo so much, even though she’s just right in front of her. She held Hyejoo even tighter. Hyejoo could feel Yerim’s body shaking.

Yerim refused to let go. 

But eventually, she had to. 

Yerim hardly hangs out with Hyejoo at school, either because of their different schedules, or Hyejoo was busy being with her other friends. Or more specifically,

Park Chaewon. 

The name that Yerim had grew to dislike hearing.

Literally everyone in school thinks that they’re together, no matter how many times they clarified that they were “just friends”. 

Sure, their height difference was hella cute,everyone envied their interactions, and just them being side by side could give people diabetes. The whole school population ships them.

Except for Yerim of course. 

Yerim knew she wasn’t in the position to get jealous. She knew that she had no rights to. But she could only tell herself that. The more she didn’t want to think about it, the more she thinks about it. 

Yerim stared and stared. Hyejoo and Chaewon was just right across the table that she and Yeojin was sitting at. Yerim was so focused on the couple that she didn’t notice (or didn’t care) that Yeojin had stolen one of her sandwiches. Yeojin raised one of her brows and eyed at Yerim, unamused. 

“Hellooooooo? Earth to Choi Yerim?” Yeojin waved her hand in front of Yerim’s face to snap her out of her daze. Yerim blinked and shook her head.

“Y-yes Yeojin? Sorry what did you say?” Yerim asked and flashed the bright smile that never fails to blind anyone.

“I didn’t say anything. I sat here eating for ten minutes straight while you were looking there for ten minutes straight. Are you a cat or something? You didn’t even blink!”

Before Yerim could reply, her attention got back to the pair behind again. She spotted how Chaewon was closing the gap in between them. Hyejoo noticed it too, and she seemed a little uncomfortable. Yerim’s eyes never left as she observed how Chaewon slid her hand in between the gap of Hyejoo’s arm and body, and Hyejoo’s expression tensed. Her whole body stiffens and she didn’t dare to move another inch. 

Hyejoo was never the type who’s comfortable with skinship. 

Hyejoo tried to remove Chaewon’s grip, but Chaewon refused to let go. Now she was just clinging onto Hyejoo’s arm, and a sly grin crept up to her pretty face. 

Yerim will never hurt anyone, but at the moment she was dying to punch someone pretty in the face. 

Yerim got up from the seat and stormed towards her target. 

She made sure that Chaewon noticed her presence, as she stared into the blonde’s eyes indifferently.

Without breaking eye contact, Yerim took the cup of water on their table and heaved it towards Chaewon. 

Everyone who saw the scene gasped. For a few seconds it was as if time has stopped, and the cafeteria was so quiet you can hear the fan blades whirling around.

Chaewon got up from her seat, and raised her right palm up. Yerim expected a tight slap from the older, but thanks to Hyejoo she remained unscathed as she gripped onto Chaewon’s wrist tightly and shook her head, pleading with her eyes. 

Chaewon slowly put down her hand and shoved Yerim out of the way, stomping out of the scene and probably towards the bathroom. Hushed whispers and conversations started to fill the air, and Hyejoo rubbed her temples. Hyejoo signaled Yerim to follow her with her finger. 

Yerim swallowed the lump in her throat and walked behind Hyejoo. 

They walked to somewhere more private, to the garden. Hyejoo turned around.

“What was that for?”

“You looked uncomfortable, so I was just trying to help-“

“Oh, so you thought that embarrassing her in front of the whole school was going to help? God, how am I suppose to explain things to her later on?”

That shut Yerim up. 

Hyejoo sighed. 

“You know that people know about us. Did you even consider how they will think about you after you did that? That my- my ex poured water all over the person that they think I like.”

“I don’t care about what they think of me.” Yerim muttered under her breath, but Hyejoo heard it.

“Okay, but you should have just left us alone.”

“Why are you so angry? You’re not the one that got drenched, you’re not the one that they’re going to gossip about.”

“YOU EMBARRASSED ME!”

Yerim was taken aback by Hyejoo’s sudden outburst. Hyejoo never shouts unless she has to. 

Yerim bit her lips to stop it from trembling and a tear escaped. Yerim turned her heels and ran, leaving Hyejoo alone. She tried her best to contain it, but she couldn’t suppress her sobs anymore. She made her way to the toilet and locked herself up in a cubicle and cried.

Her hand trembled from clasping on to the pendant. 

  
  
  
Hyejoo berated herself for raising her voice at Yerim. Why was she so mad? She ruffled through her hair and grind her teeth. Just then, her phone vibrated.

Chaewon: 

**we need to talk.**

Hyejoo:

**i’ll see you later after school**

For the rest of curriculum time, Hyejoo didn’t listen or pay attention to any of the lessons. Not that usually she will, anyways. Her mind wanders back and forth about what she was going to tell Chaewon and if Yerim ever wants to see her again. 

Hyejoo couldn’t believe she’s saying this, but she wished school wouldn’t end.

But time doesn’t stop for anyone. Hyejoo deliberately took a long time to pack. With heavy footsteps, Hyejoo trudged towards the school entrance, and spotted the familiar blonde leaning against the wall.

Chaewon’s expression was rather unreadable, so Hyejoo couldn’t guess what she’s going to throw at her. Chaewon took her hand and intertwined their fingers together.

“Let’s go, Hyejoo.”

And the both of them walked back together. The walk was quiet, slightly awkward, and just a little bit uneasy for Hyejoo. 

“So, what’s up with her?”

Okay, maybe it’s very uneasy for Hyejoo.

“Please don’t mind her.”

“Then she should have minded her own business.”

“On her behalf, I apologize.” 

“Do you still love her?”

_ Yes. _

“No.”

Chaewon smirked.

“Right. Can I come to your house today?”

“Sorry Chae, I’m kind of tired. And I’ve a pile of homework to complete today.”

“You? Doing homework? That’s a first.”

They reached the entrance to Hyejoo’s house and Hyejoo slid away from Chaewon’s fingers. She unlocked the metal gate and forced a smile to the other.

“See you tomorrow.”

Hyejoo collapsed onto the sofa and let out a huge sigh. She pulled out the chain from her pocket and observed it. Hyejoo doesn’t wear it, but she carries it around with her.

It’s still as shiny as the first day she bought it, still smooth without any scratches, and still full of meaning to her.

Yerim.

The name she had grew to love saying. The name that she will never forget. It’s been months since they had a proper conversation about their relationship.

What are they now?

Hyejoo pulled out her phone and searched for her chat with Yerim. She was hesitant about what she was going to say, and spent a long time typing and retyping. Hyejoo questioned if she should even send her a text.

But she did.

Me:

**i’m sorry for today**

Hyejoo got a reply a few minutes later.

Yerim:

**i’m sorry too**

Hyejoo noticed that Yerim was typing something else, but nothing came out of it and then she went offline. 

Hyejoo’s thoughts ran wild thinking of all the possibilities of what Yerim wanted to say.

I hate you? I don’t want to see you ever again?

Hyejoo put an abrupt stop to her overwhelming thoughts. Yerim isn’t nasty. She was too kind, too forgiving for her own good. She was everything that Hyejoo wasn’t.

Hyejoo used to get into fights, a lot. She bullied people, hurt people, and mocked people. Most of her victims never dared to step out and tell anyone, but for those who did, got her suspended and eventually expelled from her old school.

Deep down on the inside, Hyejoo put misery in others because she was miserable herself. 

Her father left before she was even born. Her mother always came home late, reeking of alcohol. Sometimes she would bring a man back, and it would be one of those days when she had to sleep outside on the couch. But her sister had to sleep on the floor, despite Hyejoo’s insistence, so Hyejoo felt like she shouldn't complain. 

Ha Sooyoung was the only person who genuinely cared about Hyejoo. She was a sister, a mother, and a friend to Hyejoo.

Growing up, Hyejoo got hit plenty of times. Especially when her mother was drunk, and that was ninety-five percent of the time when Hyejoo sees her. Her mother was almost never at home during the day, and comes back when Hyejoo was about to sleep. Hyejoo tried to sleep earlier to avoid seeing the drunkard, which did work, but sometimes her mother would just wake her up and pull her out of bed, shooting garbled slurs at her and slap her. 

Sooyoung was always the one separating the two. But only after getting some bruises. 

And of course, it hurts Hyejoo to see her sister getting dragged into the mess every single time. 

Hyejoo always wondered why her mother hated her so much, couldn’t think of anything that she did that drivened her hatred. Sooyoung knows something, but she waited until Hyejoo was old enough to understand.

It was when Hyejoo was fourteen, Sooyoung answered her.

Their mother cheated on Sooyoung’s father. She was seeing Hyejoo’s father and realized that she was impregnated with Hyejoo. She wanted to get an abortion before it gets bigger and noticeable, but Hyejoo’s father refused. 

Once the truth was out, Sooyoung’s father demanded to get a divorce, and left. 

Upon Hyejoo’s birth, Hyejoo’s father got into a car accident and left as well.

Her mother saw her as nothing but a mistake, jinx, and curse.

The very next day, Hyejoo got expelled from her school. Her mother came back early that day, and for the first time in years, Hyejoo saw her in her sober state, but she was fuming.

“You useless piece of shit. I didn’t work so hard for your fucking school fees for you to get expelled. Why did you punch somebody?”

“For fun.”

“Fucking excuse me?”

“Then why do YOU punch me? Hit me? Slap me?”

“You deserved it, brat.”

“Yeah, because I should’nt exist, I was a mistake, and you should’ve gotten an abortion. But guess what? If you could’ve just be loyal to Sooyoung’s dad, none of this would’ve happened.”

The next moment, Hyejoo was on the floor and she felt her cheek stung. There was iron taste in her mouth and blood dropped on to the floor. Her mother slaps hard, yes, but this was the hardest she had ever slapped.

“What’s going on?”

Sooyoung arrived home, and immediately ran to get Hyejoo up her feet. 

“You told her didn’t you?” Their mother glared at Sooyoung.

“She deserves to know it.”

“She doesn’t deserve anything.”

With that, she shoved Sooyoung aside and grabbed an empty beer bottle on the dining table. Hyejoo shield herself with her hands in front, bracing for the sound of glass shattering and glass cutting her skin. 

With a quick swing, glass shattered to smithereens. 

Hyejoo heard a loud thud. She opened her eyes and fear struck her. 

Sooyoung face was covered with fresh blood that was coursing down from her head. Hyejoo’s tears started to make their appearance. The door slammed closed, and the other woman was nowhere to be found. 

_Ambulance. Call the ambulance. _

On the way to the hospital, Hyejoo gripped on to Sooyoung’s hand and she couldn’t stop crying. She had never felt so scared in her entire life. Sooyoung was the only person she could confide in, the only person she cared about, the only person that she had. And now the same person was lying on the hospital bed, not waking up anytime soon.

Hyejoo thanked whoever up there that Sooyoung was still alive. 

Their so called mother was jailed and Hyejoo had to move in with her aunt and grandma. Both of her relatives were welcoming, and Hyejoo felt at ease for once. But Hyejoo felt lonely. She misses her sister dearly, and she makes frequent visits to the hospital. Everytime she sees her, her heart ached. 

Hyejoo blamed herself. 

In her new school, she distanced herself from the rest, not wanting to have anything to do with them. Her horrible mother was out of her life, so she didn’t need anyone to vent her frustrations and anger to. 

One particular person, however, was difficult to avoid.

That’s right, it was Yerim.

The girl that was the personification of optimism. She owns a smile brighter than the sun, was too friendly with people, and she had to live just opposite of Hyejoo, so there was no way that Hyejoo could not not see her.

On the first day of school, the bubbly girl just so happened to walk out of her house at the same time as Hyejoo. Spotting a new face and in the same uniform, naturally Yerim was drawn towards the newcomer.

“Hi!! I didn’t know Miss Son has a daughter. What’s your name?”

“I’m her niece.”

“Oh, okay. What’s your- hey! Wait up!”

Yerim caught up with Hyejoo, and started to blabber about things Hyejoo had no interest in. Hyejoo changed her walking pace, but Yerim followed. When she slowed down, so did she. When she fastened it, so did she. 

Eventually, Hyejoo stopped completely. 

“Not much of a talker, eh?”

“Wanna play a game?”

“Oh! Yes!”

“Alright. It’s called ‘who can shut up the longest’. Whoever talks loses.”

“What? But-”

“Starts now.”

And finally, Hyejoo got to enjoy peace and quiet. 

But not for long. 

**BEEP BEEP **

“Watch out!”

Hyejoo grabbed Yerim’s arm and pulled her back before the oncoming vehicle could reach her. The driver yelled something before the car disappeared into the distance. 

“T-thank you.” 

“Keep your eyes on the road.”

“Oh, and I won!”

“What?”

“The game. I won! Now, what do I get as a reward?”

Hyejoo stared at her in disbelief. Hyejoo expected her to be a little traumatized, not triumphing about getting a reward over a stupid game that happened in the first place to shut her up.

For the rest of the school day, Yerim pretty much stuck with her. The cheery girl was really hard to ignore, too. Hyejoo was annoyed. 

Or, was she?

If it was anybody else, Hyejoo would’ve just shove the person into a locker and locked them up. Or maybe make them eat her fist. Or maybe scare them off with her intimidating glare.

Hyejoo found it weird that she refused to do what she had done for as long as she was in school. Everytime Hyejoo tried to make a move, she’s met with those sparkling pair of eyes that becomes thinner as a soft smile forms. 

Then her stomach will do flip flops and she would feel her cheeks burning.

It’s mysterious, incomprehensible, and confusing. 

Yet, Hyejoo liked it.

It was only a matter of time before she realized that she likes _ her. _

Hyejoo sometimes do still get frustrated over people. And when Hyejoo gets frustrated, her fists get involved too.

Yerim never knew that Hyejoo was so violent, until the day her sister got into a fight with her.

Hyejoo walked out of the principal’s office, followed by Hyunjin whose eye was in a shade too dark to be normal. Hyunjin threw away the tissue that was completely stained with blood and massaged her neck. 

“You’ll get it from me next time, Son Hyejoo."

“Keep trying, whatever your name is.”

Hyunjin was about to strangle Hyejoo when she noticed someone standing in front of them.

“Oh. Hi Yerim.” Both of them said in unison. 

Hyejoo got a little worried when Yerim saw the bad side of her. But Yerim didn’t treat her any lesser. She didn’t even care about what others told her. Telling her to stay away from someone as unpredictable as Hyejoo.

For the first time, Hyejoo felt accepted. 

_“Let go Yerim.”_

_“No Hyejoo. Look at me.”_

_Hyejoo looked at her, anger boiling inside of her and eyes swollen from crying._

_Yerim cupped her cheeks and wiped away her tears with her thumb. _

_Hyejoo’s mind wasn’t thinking straight. Someone made fun of her broken family that day. She could still hear their laughing and taunting inside her head. _

_The more she thought about it, the more she couldn’t control herself._

_“LET GO!”_

_Hyejoo threw her hand forward hard, and the cracking of skin contacting skin reverberated through the empty hallway. _

_The red from her vision cleared, and Hyejoo realized what she’d done._

_“I-I’m s-so-sorry- I’m- so, so **sorry.”**_

_Hyejoo knew it stung by the way Yerim cupped her right cheek and how she’s fighting back her tears. _

_Nonetheless, Yerim’s watery eyes found their way back to Hyejoo’s again._

_“I won’t let you go until you’ve calmed down.” _

_And Hyejoo sobbed again. Yerim pulled her into an embrace, comforting her and patting her back gently._

_Hyejoo thought how much of a horrible person she was. How she was just a burden to anyone around her. How much she hated herself._

_“She’s right. I, I shouldn’t, shouldn’t have been, born...”_

_“I’ll prove her wrong.”_

That day, Hyejoo made a vow to never, ever, use violence again. 

Hyejoo apologized to the people that she had hurt. Some did not take her seriously, but those who did, forgave her. Hyejoo had learnt to ignore people’s comments, after she realized that it doesn’t matter what other people think about her or her family. 

Because all they know was how to gossip and not the truth.

True enough, once she started to ignore, people ignored her too. Soon, she was no longer the topic people would bring up, and stares no longer followed her wherever she goes in school. 

And it doesn’t matter because whatever she had was enough.

Yerim was enough. 

Hyejoo confessed on Valentine’s day. She knows it’s pretty cliché, but the day exists for a reason, right? So she used her savings and got both of them custom matching necklaces.

It wasn’t cheap, and she wasn’t even sure if Yerim would accept it, but it was all worth it when the brunette shouted yes without hesitation and pounced on her and kissed her face everywhere.

They dated for six months, and for six months, Hyejoo was the happiest.

Until, _ she _came back.

Her mother was discharged from prison, and Hyejoo was obligated to see her. 

“Break up with her.”

“What?”

“You’re dating a girl, aren’t you? Break up with her.”

“You don’t tell me what to do when it comes to my happiness.”

“If you don’t do it, I’ll make sure I step in.”

“Don’t you fucking dare touch her.”

“Then break up with her.”

Hyejoo slammed the table with her fist. How dare she dictate her on what to do? 

“Fuck you.”

Hyejoo couldn’t sleep that night. She tossed and turned in her bed, frustration and anger eating her up. 

There was no way that she was going to break up with Yerim just because of her. But Hyejoo was worried about what the monster would do to Yerim if she didn’t. 

So Hyejoo started to be cold and distant. Yerim noticed it of course, but she never questioned. It was absolutely devastating seeing the smile of Yerim’s getting dimmer and dimmer each passing day. How her eyes lost their shine subsequently, and the pain in her eyes tore Hyejoo apart. 

Hyejoo apologized, and lied about losing her feelings.

Yerim hoped that they could still be friends, and Hyejoo agreed.

There weren’t a day Hyejoo stopped thinking about her. Hyejoo hated how Yerim didn’t treat her any lesser despite being heartbroken. 

Still smiley and friendly, even though sorrow was evident in her eyes each time Hyejoo meets her. Hyejoo knew that Yerim still looked at her like she was her entire world. And it pains Hyejoo that she couldn’t do the same back to her.

Then Chaewon came into the picture. The blonde was going to be late for class so she was in a rush with books and paper piled up in her hands, and ran into the raven because she didn’t watch where she was going. Hyejoo didn’t want to brag, but it was love at first sight for Chaewon. 

And somehow, she’d gotten Hyejoo’s number and started texting her. Yeojin admitted that she was bribed by Chaewon. (Hyejoo wasn’t surprised.) Hyejoo let Chaewon stuck with her, because she thought it would help her move on from Yerim. Hyejoo tried to like her like how she liked Yerim, but it doesn’t work like that. So no matter how pretty or rich or anything Chaewon is, Hyejoo will never fall for her, because she wants Yerim, and Chaewon isn’t Yerim.

“Hyejoo?”

It was her grandma. 

“She’s awake.”

Hyejoo sat up.

“Sooyoung’s awake.”

Hyejoo rushed to the hospital as soon as she received the news. Hyejoo ran, despite being told not to by the nurses and doctors and whoever that was working in the hospital. Adrenaline was flowing through her body, and she was desperate to see her sister as quickly as possible.

It’s almost been two long years.

Two long years without Sooyoung.

Hyejoo turned the doorknob and almost yanked the door out of its place. 

There she was. 

“H-Hyejoo…”

Alive. Conscious.

Hyejoo made her way to the bedside. Once the first tear appeared, the rest followed with no control. Bittersweetly, a smile formed while joyful tears flowed down freely.

“I missed you…”

Their reunion was interrupted when someone else barged in.

It was a lady that Hyejoo had never seen before.

“SOOYOUNG!!!!”

The unfamiliar lady screamed and pounced on to Hyejoo’s sister. She sobbed into Sooyoung’s gown and Sooyoung couldn’t help but shed a tear as well. 

Hyejoo was confused.

“Oh. This is Jiwoo. My girlfriend.”

“Wait what? You had a girlfriend and you never told me?”

“Well, Mum wasn’t exactly the most accepting person so I played safe. I was planning on telling you though, but I got, you know.”

Jiwoo pulled away, saving Sooyoung from the bear hug, and sniffed. 

“Not the best way to make an impression, but hi! I’m Kim Jiwoo.”

The woman then proceeded to give Hyejoo a tight squeeze, and Hyejoo couldn’t breathe properly for a second. 

She even pinched Hyejoo’s cheeks and called her adorable. Her? Adorable? Hyejoo let it slide since she was her sister’s girlfriend.

“To be honest, I wasn’t expecting you. But thank you, for waiting for me.” Sooyoung said.

“I’ll always wait for you.” Jiwoo replied lovingly.

Hyejoo tried hard not to cringe at the two lovebirds.

Jiwoo left the room and to get a drink, giving the two sisters some catching up time. 

Hyejoo was glad that Sooyoung remembered what happened before the incident, and she was still the same Sooyoung, nothing really changed about her. 

She was still the Sooyoung who likes to tease Hyejoo, who acts tough even though she was the biggest softie ever, and who still is the person that Hyejoo had known for all her life.

Hyejoo was having a great time, until the door swung opened, and a newcomer stood at the entrance.

The siblings stared at their mother, and the whole room grew silent.

She walked towards them slowly, her eyes never leaving from Sooyoung.

“Sooyoung."

Jiwoo came in right after, and stopped humming and her eyes widened.

Hyejoo swallowed the lump in her throat. This was not going to turn out pretty.

“Who are you?” The oldest in the room asked, and Jiwoo tried to avoid eye contact at all cost.

“She’s my girlfriend.” Sooyoung replied for her.

Hyejoo wrung her hands unsettlingly.

“Pardon?”

“She is my girlfriend.”

The woman rubbed her temples.

“Why, Sooyoung? Why?”

“Why what?”

“You just haven’t found the right man yet.”

“I don’t care about finding anyone else. She is the one.”

“You know what I mean Sooyoung. Just no. 

“Mum. I’m twenty-one. Turning twenty-two soon. I’m an adult now. Why can’t you just let me be?”

“It’s not normal, Sooyoung…”

“Just me being me is not normal? Just me loving someone is not normal? Just me wanting to find my own happiness is not normal?

“...”

“If you can’t accept who I am, then I'll leave.” 

Hyejoo was a tad bit of surprised when Sooyoung decided to come out right there and then. But she was immensely proud of her sister for standing up for herself. 

Their mother said nothing more and left the room, slamming the door. 

"Sorry, I ruined the mother and daughter reunion…” Jiwoo apologized.

“No love, don’t feel bad. She has to find out eventually anyway.”

Hyejoo smiled at the couple. And she was reminded of a specific someone.

“Oh, Sooyoung, l’ve something to say too.”

.

.

.

“Oh cmon, why did you let mum break the two of you up?”

“I’m worried about what that woman will do to her. You know how violent she can get.”

“Well yeah, but you could’ve just lied.”

“I totally didn’t think of that. You know I’ll die if I lie.”

“Anyways, go get ya girl back. You miss her don't you? Don’t leave her hanging.”

“But, that woman…”

“I’ll handle it. I’ll talk her out of it.”

“Nobody in the world can match her stubbornness.”

“I’ve my ways.”

With that, Sooyoung gave Hyejoo a wink.

Hyejoo envied the couple in front of her. Jiwoo reminded her a lot about someone. Bright, vibrant, warm, and really, really patient. She had waited for two years for Sooyoung, even though it had definitely been excruciatingly long, and lonely, with no knowledge of whether her lover will see her ever again.

Sooyoung got so lucky with Jiwoo.

Hyejoo got so lucky with Yerim.

On the same day, Yerim received a text from Hyejoo.

Hyejoo:

**can we talk? my place on friday**

Yerim:

**i’ll be there**

Friday came, and Hyejoo was ecstatic. But she was a little jumpy as well. It’s been three days since Yerim spoke to her or even texted her after that day. 

She was starting to doubt that Yerim was going to show up when she heard a knock on the door. 

“Sorry for being later than expected. Was held back.”

Hyunjin refuses to let Yerim out of the house, but Yerim told her that she always mean what she says.

Yerim, again, wasn’t sure why she agreed to be there in the first place. She blamed it on her impulsiveness. 

But Yerim knew that she just couldn’t say no to Hyejoo.

“It’s okay, no worries.”

Yerim was really worried about what Hyejoo was going to talk to her about. What if Hyejoo tells her that she wants to end their friendship? Or even worse, what if she gets beaten up so badly and never see daylight ever again? 

Yerim made these assumptions based on past experiences. 

Never, ever, mess with people that Hyejoo deeply cares about.

But Yerim did just that.

She messed with Chaewon.

(Yerim didn’t know that Hyejoo didn’t really care about so much Chaewon to the extent of beating people up.)

“... and I’m sorry.”

Oh? Hyejoo was talking all this time? Yerim snapped back to reality.

“It’s o-okay. Really. I’m sorry too.”

“You don’t have to apologize. I understand that you were just trying to help me. 

Hyejoo smiled. There they go again, the butterflies that emerged in Yerim’s stomach are probably having a party right now.

“You… wanna come in and play…?”

Yerim couldn’t say no, of course.

They played Mario Kart, and Yerim couldn’t help but do a victory dance everytime she beat Hyejoo in the race. Hyejoo may be good at a lot of games, but when it comes to Mario Kart, Yerim wins by a mile (no pun intended). 

A bunch of keys were heard clanging against one another and Hyejoo dropped her controller when she saw Sooyoung coming in the house. 

“Sooyoung!”

Yerim furrowed her eyebrows. The name sounds familiar…

“What’s up little sis. Oh, you brought a guest.”

Oh yeah. They are sisters.

“Hi! I’m Yerim.”

“Oh. Hi there, Yerim.”

Yerim noticed that Sooyoung gave Hyejoo a sneaky little wink and Hyejoo’s face tinted red.

What was that supposed to mean?

“By the way, Mum won’t be home today… so enjoy while you can.”

Sooyoung said, and left for her room. 

“G-gimme a minute.”

Hyejoo went after her sister. Yerim sat alone in the living room, with her head tilted sideways.

Hyejoo came out of her sister’s room a while later, and took in a deep breath. 

Hyejoo looked flustered. Yerim wondered what happened.

They went in Hyejoo’s room. Hyejoo, being the gamer that she was, was busy smashing the buttons and clicking the mouse away. Yerim sat beside her, observing. 

Yerim was hugging the wolf plushie that Hyejoo loves so much. Hyejoo claimed that the wolf was her spirit animal. Yerim had to admit that their resemblance was uncanny. 

Hyejoo smashed her keyboard. Yerim jerked.

“Argh. Why do I always get teammates like that?”

Hyejoo looked like she was about to pounce. Yerim could never understand why gamers get so angry while playing games. It’s just a game isn’t it?

“Here. You try.”

Hyejoo took off her headphones and placed them onto Yerim’s head. They exchanged seats. Yerim always wanted to learn to play League of Legends, to see what’s so fun about it.

Hyejoo teached Yerim the controls, and Yerim was pretty clumsy in the beginning. Yerim mainly couldn’t control the mouse properly. 

Hyejoo placed her hand on top of Yerim’s, and helped her click the right buttons. 

How’d you expect Yerim to concentrate when Hyejoo’s hand is on hers?

Eventually, Yerim got the hang of the controls, and started playing the game on her on. She understood why it was so addicting, just the sound of clicking was so satisfying to hear. She also understood why people gets pissed off, Yerim didn’t get that annoyed but was a little when her teammates stole her kills.

Like they always say, time always flies faster when you’re having fun. 

It was close to evening before Yerim even knew it.

“Stay, please.”

All it took was two words from Hyejoo for Yerim to ring the phone at her house and explain how she was going to stay over at Hyejoo’s to a very, very reluctant Hyunjin. 

The things Yerim does for Hyejoo. 

Bedtime came and the lights were off.

A thunderstorm woke Yerim up. The sickening roar of thunder jerked her from the bed. She enveloped herself with her blanket and covered her ears. Yerim never liked thunderstorms. They were too scary and too loud.

The thunder only got louder and louder each time a bolt of lightning flashes. Another lightning tore across the sky, and the deafening clap of thunder made Yerim screeched. Even Hyejoo finally woken up because the thunder was that loud. And also maybe it’s because Yerim clung onto her back like how a koala would to a tree. 

Yerim was absolutely petrified. She started to weep, her tears smudging onto Hyejoo’s pajamas. Yes, it’s embarrassing, and thank god the lights were out. Yerim hoped that Hyejoo didn’t mind.

Though hesitant at first, Hyejoo held Yerim’s hands which were tightly grasping on to her stomach and caressed them. 

Yerim felt a little bit better feeling Hyejoo’s touch. 

Hyejoo shifted herself to face Yerim. She reciprocated Yerim’s hug and pulled her closer. Yerim did not expected that at all. Her face was buried into Hyejoo’s upper body, as she breathed in the smell of jasmines. Hyejoo gently stroked Yerim’s hair and patted her back lightly. 

Yerim could hear her heartbeat. 

Another thunderbolt. It wasn’t as loud, but it still made Yerim shudder. Hyejoo let out a chuckle, teasing Yerim. Yerim gave her a timid knock on the back. Hyejoo left a kiss on Yerim’s forehead and whispered words, but Yerim couldn’t catch them because she was too busy trying to calm her palpitating heart down. She was close to losing her mind. 

“Hey, are you ok?”

“W-what? Yeah, I’m fine! Like, really!”

Yerim squeezed Hyejoo tighter and nuzzled her head. 

“Now, be quiet or else I’ll kiss you!”

“Yeah sure go a-“

Yerim’s words came out muffled because, well, Hyejoo really did what she said she would do, and Yerim’s mind went haywire. Hyejoo’s lips still tasted the same, it’s so soft and warm and it made her melt. It’s crazy to Yerim how Hyejoo could still give her butterflies in her stomach and the uncontrollable heat that rose up to her head, just like the first time they kissed.

Hyejoo cupped Yerim’s cheek and she tugged her closer, as close as they can possibly be. The kiss started as innocent and sweet, but it got bold and needy real quick. It was as if Hyejoo was desperate, kissing her like it’s the last time, like she had been yearning for it. Yerim struggled to keep up the rhythm until she realized that she wanted it as much as Hyejoo did. When things got too heated in between Hyejoo pulled away just for a quick but deep breath before she captured Yerim’s lips again. 

Yerim felt like she was on fire as the blood rushed through every part of her body, and Hyejoo raised her body temperature even higher every time she slid her tongue into Yerim’s mouth, or whenever she bit onto her bottom lips. Hyejoo was so intoxicating, so addicting, but Yerim knew when to draw the line.

“Alright, that’s... that’s enough...” Yerim muttered breathlessly and pushed away Hyejoo’s lips with her index finger.

They laid there wordlessly, still inches away from each other, and Yerim could feel the hot breathes being exchanged. Sure, Yerim may not be saying anything, but on the inside all she wanted to do was to scream. Hyejoo. Just. Kissed. Her. It wasn’t the first time, yes, but it’s Hyejoo kissing her after what felt like forever, and the way she kissed her made her want even more. 

“Sorry, might have gotten a little too carried away.”

Yerim sighed before she pressed her head against Hyejoo’s chest and curled up into a ball. Hyejoo apologized too much.

“You’re forgiven if you cuddle with me while we sleep.” 

Yerim couldn’t see it, but she was so darn sure that Hyejoo smiled. Hyejoo held Yerim in her arms, just like how she always wanted it. Yerim slightly moved her head up to place a peck on Hyejoo’s cheek.

“Good night, baby wolf.”

“Good night, sunshine.”

Yerim fell asleep to the smell of jasmine.

It was the best sleep Yerim had gotten in months. 

The sun rose and the leaves were dripping with rain water that downed the previous night. Light reflected into Hyejoo’s room and the chirping of birds brought Hyejoo up from her slumber. Hyejoo rubbed her sleepy eyes and a yawn escaped. The first thing that registered to her mind was how warm and cozy it felt, and she grinned upon seeing the girl that she had held throughout the night.

Hyejoo found the sight endearing.

The events that occurred yesterday came back to Hyejoo, and she couldn’t help but feel a little bashful. What a bold move she had made. Was it dauntless bravery or pure rashness? Hyejoo thinks that it’s the latter. 

At least, her craving had been satisfied.

“Hyejoo smiling in the morning?”

Yerim’s voice was raspy. 

“That’s new.”

Hyejoo couldn’t help but grin even wider. How could she not when the person that she loves so much was smiling so warmly at her?

Hyejoo wanted to kiss her again. But she hesitated.

Could she really get Yerim back?

Hyejoo went forward and gave her a quick peck, leaving them both red in the face. 

Hyejoo was _ absolutely _getting her back.

Sooyoung held on to her words. She had sat down and talked to their mother. Hyejoo doesn't know how she does it, but after hours of conflicts and arguments, their mother threw her hands up and finally accepted reality. Being the only person in the world their mother genuinely cares about might be the reason why she gave in.

Hyejoo couldn’t be more thankful. Sooyoung took both Jiwoo and Hyejoo out to celebrate, and Hyejoo finally felt the weight on her shoulders being lifted.

“Now will you get your girl back?” Sooyoung asked teasingly.

“Do you even have to ask?” Hyejoo feigned annoyance.

Hyejoo was excited for school. Not for the school, of course, but to see Yerim. She made her way to school as quickly as her legs could carry her, and burst into the school building. 

There she was. 

** _RINGGGGGGGGGGGG_ **

Of _ freaking _course the bell just had to ring at such an important time.

“Yerim!” 

Yerim turned her head.

“Meet me here after school!”

Hyejoo managed to get her message through before the whole school population stampeded her.

  
  
  
Yerim walked out of the classroom, finally done with the day. She walked towards the hallway to meet Hyejoo.

There was a crowd. Yerim naturally was drawn to it to see what the commotion was about. 

Her heart dropped.

Hyejoo leaned against the wall, with someone impossibly close to her. Yerim squinted and recognized the blonde.

Park Chaewon.

Hyejoo called her here for her to see _ this _?

Chaewon sneakily stotle a kiss from Hyejoo, and stayed there for two good seconds before pulling away. Hyejoo had her eyes wide opened. Everyone else was cheering and some were whistling. Yerim was just... there. Her chest tightened and her heart was shattered into a million pieces. 

“Son Hyejoo, I like you for a while now.” 

Chaewon confessed, with a mischievous yet lovable smile. Hyejoo’s face was covered in the color red. She just stared at Chaewon, flustered. Chaewon held out the rose that she had brought for Hyejoo. Hyejoo peered at it. 

Yerim couldn’t watch on anymore. 

Yerim pushed her way out of the crowd. She ran down the hallways, away from the scene. 

Alone, she sits at the corner of the bathroom. Yerim hugged her legs close to her, head hung low. Who knows how long she had stayed there.

Yerim was so hurt. Just how many times was she willing to let her heart break for the same person over and over again? Each time the wound has healed, another area bleeds again.

Hyejoo bursts into the bathroom. She sees Yerim. She takes careful steps towards her. She kneels down on the floor and brushes Yerim’s silky hair with her fingers gently. 

Yerim tilts her head upwards just a little bit to see who it is. She feels a bit surprised that it was Hyejoo. Their eyes locked. Yerim is devastated. Hyejoo looks sad. Or is she feeling guilty? 

Hyejoo tries to pull Yerim into her, but Yerim pushes her away. Yerim starts sending light punches to Hyejoo, conveying her emotions. Anger. Sadness. Betrayal. Jealousy. 

Yerim stops. She makes eye contact with Hyejoo again, tears welling up in her orbs. Yerim tries her best to hold it in. Hyejoo wipes away some of the liquid. Yerim likes how careful and soft she is being. Yerim feels pathetic, feels like she is some kind of joke. She flashes a sad smile. The saddest smile Hyejoo has ever seen.

No, Yerim doesn’t hate Hyejoo.

She can never hate Hyejoo. 

Yerim loves Hyejoo, even if Hyejoo doesn’t anymore.

Maybe that’s why she _ lets _ her heart bleed for her.

Hyejoo saw Yerim in the crowd. God, what a mess. Chaewon just _ had _to pick today, of all days, to confess. In front of a gazillion people. Hyejoo’s mind went haywire when Chaewon kissed her, and she would have pushed her away if her whole body didn’t freeze on the spot.

‘Son Hyejoo. I liked you for a while now.’

Hyejoo’s face was burning, definitely not because of Chaewon, but she was sheepish. Must she do _ that _ in front of all these people too? 

Chaewon took out a rose from behind her back and held it in front of Hyejoo. Hyejoo felt bad for what she was going to say next. 

When she noticed Yerim stepping out from the crowds, Hyejoo didn’t even bother using words anymore. Hyejoo just left. 

  
  
  


  
  


Hyejoo pulled something out from her neck. 

She took Yerim’s necklace that was dangling out.

She fitted the pendants together.

“Choi Yerim-ah, will... you g-go out with me...?

Hyejoo said. 

Just like the first time when she confessed.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! Thanks for reading this, even though it was a little rushed. The idea was based on some experiences, but most of the story is made up. This was in my drafts for quite a while, and just wanted to finish it. Comments and kudos are appreciated, but most importantly hope you enjoyed reading it! How Yerim would respond to Hyejoo at the end is up to you to decide ;)
> 
> You can follow me on twitter  
@blastintoorbit  
https://curiouscat.me/blastintoorbit


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